Is it a matter of brain and character?

Some people say a smart man with a strong character will always be with a woman who is not as smart and with a softer character. Does that mean that if you are a woman with a strong character and a powerful brain, you will end up with someone somehow not as smart or with a special character like yours?

I refuse to believe it. I know some examples of successful relationships built of both remarkable individuals even if I must say that gathering evidence by personal experience, considering myself a decently smart woman with a rather strong character; and looking at my friends who are not less than me, we haven’t been able to have a long lasting relationship with any of the remarkable men we have spent some time with.

I had this discussion with many of my good friends… why would I try to be with someone who is not special? Someone who I wouldn’t consider equal or better than me in particular aspects of life?

I certainly wouldn’t, and therefore the men I have been with have always been excellent at something and have had a personal interest and passion for something, which could be considering something similar to me and most of my friends, what brings us together or apart. And yes, most of the people I consider remarkable are single and/or confess to have a real problem to commit (to a relationship, to a country or a job) because they think/feel that this long term commitment implies they would renounce to certain dreams or ambitions that they certainly want to pursue.

Is our drive to achieve and to remain independent, free and flexible to be successful at something of our choice pushing us to believe that we don’t need unconditional love anymore? Why is it that most of us gave up “happily ever after” to take “as long as it lasts”?

Do we do it to preserve that sense of freedom, sometimes fake or is “until death tear you apart” something that became awfully eternal and impossible to manage? Have we become too selfish?

Think of all the recklessness people have to handle each other and their emotions. Most people are reckless to eachother and they will make wonder to those who are not. If everyone is reckless to hurt me, why would I care not to hurt them?

Is caring nowadays a quality that only belongs to certain people with a higher level of humanity?

Is our thirst for success keeping us apart from being human? Are we so fixated in our personal progression that we are reducing our interactions with others to the mere completion of our basic physical and social needs? Is that fixation what causes the so well known inability to feel or feel to feel something for one another we all so much talk about? Could it be what creates a void and a lack of intimacy in most young people despite the incredible connexions that today’s world enables?

Maybe it doesn’t depend on the brains or character we have, but in our individual ability and willingness to get involved…